Laying the foundation
in the beginning is the first step to a successful relationship.
Foundations based on stability offer a rewarding, long-lasting
relationship, while unstable foundations lead to breakups. Therapy is
good, but if you can sit down and talk through your own problems this
is the best solution and it will save you money. Talking is the mark of
eliminating problems, while frustration comes from those who cannot
form the skills to communicate.
Incompatibility can
lead to breakup, thus weighing out your relationship vigilantly before
beginning a relationship can prevent disaster. If you are already
involved in a toxic relationship more than likely, you will need to
evaluate the compatibilities. You do have the options of working
through the incompatibilities or getting out.
Compatibility extends
to family history. If you are suffering problems due to family
quarrels, the ride gets strenuous. Families that tend to like the
person their child is with, is less likely to give you problems. Toxic
relationships are painful when families butt into your business
frequently. Many persons who begin relationships and have been with
their mate for sometime may find that neither party is compatible. The
relationship can still work if the two of you communicate and comprise
a plan that both can agree on. Read and learn the steps in good
relationships by buying books that offer a good strategy for the
incompatible couples.
Many times people
commit to relationships with the idea that they can change the other
person later. This is not good! Either you like whom you meet, or you
do not. No one can change another human being, the person must have the
desire to change him or her self, and the first step to change is
acceptance and then willingness to make the changes.
One should be skeptical
of those who vow to change for you. Often the promises are not met, or
the person has “hidden terrors” that could be forced onto you later.
If you are a dreamer,
you may look at your mate as a fantasy. This is not good either. You
lose the benefits by not getting to know the person you have mated with
or you wake up from your dream and find that you made a serious
mistake.
The chief focus to keep
in mind is to communication, spend quality time, stay focused, and lay
a good foundation for your relationship; keep it honest and learn to
trust one another, with unselfish motives.
Selfishness has lead to
various problems, including adultery, murder, fornication, theft, and
so forth. Thus, selfish is one of the leading causes of breakups in
relationships and marriage.
As you can see, sharing
plays a large part in love and relationships. When two people share,
they are giving something to the other that leaves a lasting feeling of
joy and love. Two people working together without selfishness often
build a relationship on solid grounds, and often endure through
tribulations, joyous moments, and so forth. Relationships built on
solid grounds rarely fall apart when troubles come their way. Thus,
enhance your toxic relationship, or get out!