Forgiveness is part of the tools needed in relationships to make love
work. Forgiveness is letting your mate know that you realize they are
human and will make mistakes.
When a person lacks the ability to
forgive in relationships, it often causes problems along the way. Many
relationships fall apart since one partner may say I forgive you, while
showing behaviors that say otherwise. When a person forgives, they let
go of the thinking that triggers the emotions repeatedly and continue
their relationship without throwing the mistake up in the partners face
later down the road.
Some people use mistakes as a tool to
control the mate down the road. Thus, they will accumulate the mistakes
and only use them when the moment arises to benefit the person. Thus,
this is only adding fire to the flames already burning hot in the
crevices of the minds emotions.
Accumulating mistakes to use as a
weapon is not showing regard for the mate. Although the mate made a
mistake, (depends on the mistake), it does not mean the mate does not
have love for his/her partner.
Mistakes are a part of life, and when a
person learns from their mistakes, it illustrates loyalty and
commitment. Examples of mistakes made in relationship can help you to
appreciate humanity and love.
Men often complain about their mates
making them sleep on the couch, or denying them of intimacy because of
mistakes made. Examine this idea closely and tell me what you see?
First, the mate is using sex as a
weapon to control the mate. The mate is also going against the
commitment in the relationship. What can a person possibly do so wrong
that makes the mate say you are sleeping on the couch tonight, or else
you are not getting it tonight? Did the mate commit adultery? If so,
thus sleeping on the couch or denying the partner of sex is
appropriate. Did the mate abuse the partner, by striking at the person
physically? If so, getting out of the relationship is smarter than
denying. Did the mate come home and slouch in front of the television
again without regarding the partner?
Now we can review and examining the
situation to determine if denying is appropriate. If your mate comes
home each day and slouches in front of the television, thus denying is
not the solution to fix the problem. Rather, someone must open the
channels of communication to find a solution and resolve the problem.
Willingness, consideration, openness, and other elements are essential
on both parties’ behalf to work through this situation. Denying the
partner, will only lead to bigger problems down the road? If the
partner feels neglected, or denied ongoing, thus eventually the human
needs to feel needed, wanted and fulfilled will escalate to possible
relations outside of the relationship.
The partner may fail to see that he/she
too were neglectful in the relationship and act out of emotions, thus
committing the ultimate sin that issues divorce.
Although this happens in relationships,
some fail even though one party never denies the mate, and works hard
to uphold their commitment to the partner. Some mates commit adultery,
since the ultimate reason for relationship is wanton, or desire. If the
soul mate is upholding their commitment and the partner commits
adultery, thus the person may have reasons in mind, or behaviors and
habit that lead up to the act.
If the partner is viewing, have
inappropriate materials, or other influences sparking the emotions and
thoughts, thus the person more likely than not will slip along the path
of love. When a person feeds the mind garbage, thus garbage will come
out along the path, regardless of the person’s way of life. Almost any
incident when a person fed the mind with garbage, thus the person
slipped along the way. The person will violate the beliefs, traditions,
standards, and commitment of others for selfish gain, thus telling the
mate you mean nothing to me.
If you are considering love and
relationship, you may want to take the time to ask your self what you
expect from a relationship, and what you will not tolerate in a
relationship.